The Right Aggression

What is Aggression?

It is very difficult to define aggression. Whether aggression is good or bad is another difficult question to answer. This is because there is no specific definition of aggression. It all depends on the way we show it. If it's shown to inflict pain then it is wrong aggression. If it's shown to achieve the desired goal without harming anyone then it is right aggression.

The Wrong Aggression

Consider a situation in the game of soccer where a centre forward player using his skills manages to go past the opposite team defenders. He is now moving towards the goal post to score a goal; however, his running speed did not match his brilliant dribbling skill and one of the opposing team defenders manages to catch up with him, defends him and clears the ball away from the goal post. If the centre forward player gets annoyed with the defender and yells at him and tries to hurt him physically then this can be termed as wrong aggression because his reaction was impulsive and he showed aggression in his behaviour. This is not going to benefit him or his team in any way. In fact, he stands at the risk of being given a red card and sent off from the ground which is not only bad for him but also for his team who will have to play with one player short.

The Right Aggression

Instead of being annoyed with the defender for no fault of his, he should have just analysed what went wrong. If he had analysed, he would have understood that though he dribbled well he lacked speed. Keeping this in mind, the next time he goes past the defenders he should run faster than he did previously and make sure that the defenders don't catch up with him. This way he can come closer to the goal post and score a goal. This kind of aggression would have been more calculative and more importantly not motivated by anger which would have helped him stay focused on the goal. This can be termed as right aggression because the player would have shown aggression in his game and not in his behaviour. His act would have been more strategic and not impulsive.

Why do we display wrong aggression most of the time?

Not just in sport, even in our daily lives, there would be various instances where we will find ourselves in situations where we can either display the right aggression or the wrong aggression. It's all in our hands but sadly most of the time we end up displaying the wrong aggression because we find it very difficult to control our emotions.

Being blamed for someone else's fault is definitely unfair.  But if we are responsible for something then we need to accept it and face the consequences. Sometimes our ego hurts when people pinpoint our mistakes, even if we have made a blunder. We end up reacting arrogantly because truth can be bitter. But remember, only those who are exposed will feel that truth is bitter. There is a famous saying "Truth is bitter to those who are comfortable with the lie". We like to be surrounded only by those who praise us all the time. When we don't deserve to be praised for something, we still humbly accept it, but when we are penalized for doing something wrong then it becomes unacceptable to us and we display the wrong aggression. 

Head your aggression in the right direction

Accepting your mistake and taking responsibility is the first step in solving a problem. Only then you will be able to analyze the problem and find out what went wrong. In this way, you will be able to avoid the same mistake next time. We face the wrath of our professors and parents when we score low marks in our exams. We face the wrath of our manager at the workplace when we fail in our work task. In all these cases you need to understand that you are not being isolated, and you are not a victim of anyone's personal vengeance. There is a reason why you are having to face it. Being annoyed about it is not a solution, it will only prolong.

The defender in the soccer field was only trying to win the match for his team and had nothing personal against the centre forward player. Similarly, the manager at the workplace or your parents and professors have nothing personal against you and are not trying to bring you down due to any personal vendetta. Don't display your aggression in the form of anger, instead make sure your aggression heads in the right direction. Aggression should be displayed only to correct your mistake resulting in a positive outcome. 

AUTHOR NAME - Vinod Balan [Member of Play2Discover NGO]
AUTHOR MAIL - vinod.balan883@gmail.com
AUTHOR PH NUM - 9710844641

(My name is Vinod. I have created this blog for my NGO and I have written this content. I have sent a request to publish this in a reputed article writing website in which I had registered a few days ago with username as Vinod0790. The article website owner can be assured that this will not create any plagiarisation issue as I am the sole owner of this content.)