The Misconception
“Taking a risk can
be dangerous.” This was my mind voice before September 2017. “Not taking a risk can be
the biggest risk.” And magically, my mind voice changed from that day
onwards, September 18, 2017. Every time I feel dejected, I reminisce about that
day when I saw two kids kicking and passing the ball to each other.
I had worked in
software development for about five years. The first few years were good. But,
after a certain point in time, I realized that this is not what I want to do in
my life. I have always been passionate about sports and wanted to be associated
with this field. But I didn’t attempt to change my career to that field because
it was difficult to get out of my comfort zone, and I had some very
narrow-minded thinking.
I used to only
think about the risks involved in making the switch as it would mean rebuilding
my career from scratch. I only thought about the problems involved in being
part of an unconventional field. I always thought to myself: “The best way
of living a happy life is by making sure that no issues or problems ever crop
up.” I was clearly living under a misconception which I would go on to
realize much later.
A Simple Game of Kicking & Passing
One day, I and
some of my friends decided to meet up on a nearby ground and play a game of
football. People come here for walking, jogging, and many kids also come here
to play football and cricket. The ground remains completely occupied during the
weekends. After playing football for more than an hour, we decided to rest
under a tree and chat. Two kids came up to us and asked for the ball as they
wanted to play and they didn’t have one. We gave it to them and they started
playing by just kicking and passing the ball to each other.
A New Challenge
They were having a
good time as it was just kicking and passing. After watching them play for some
time I decided to make it a little challenging for them. I went and stood
between the two of them. They stared at me, and I had a smile on my face. I
said, “Pass the ball to each other by making sure that I don’t get hold of the
ball.” They were a little reluctant but they agreed to it. They found it a
little difficult as I kept stopping the ball whenever they tried to pass it to
each other. But, along with the difficulty level, their concentration level
also increased. When I charged towards one of them from the left, he moved to
his right and passed the ball to the other kid. When I charged from the right,
he moved to his left and passed the ball. He was analyzing the situation and
playing accordingly.
An Additional Challenge
I decided to make
it more challenging and called one of my friends. Now, two of us were standing
at the centre and the kids had to pass the ball to each other by making sure
that I and my friend don’t get hold of the ball. The situation got tougher, but
they decided to bring the best out of them. They knew that simple passing
wouldn’t work now. So, they decided to utilize their skills. One of them
started dribbling the ball and kept looking at both of us. It looked like he
was trying to figure out our height. He placed his foot under the ball and flicked
it. We had our jaws dropped as we watched the ball travel over our heads and
reach the other kid. Both the kids jumped up in joy. And, my friend was puzzled
when he saw me jumping up in joy as well. That moment was the turning point in
my life. “Dude, we have lost. Why are you celebrating?” He asked. I was amazed
by their skills, and I noticed that the kid was surprised as he himself had no
idea about this talent that he had.
The Important Learning From The Game
We all left after
some time. Even after reaching home, I kept thinking about that game. In fact,
I kept thinking about it the whole night without being able to sleep. If the
game hadn’t got tougher; if I and my friend hadn’t stood at the centre, the
kids would have never realized their potential, as they would have just kept
passing the ball to each other. I tried to associate the game with our lives. When everything is
going normally in our life without any problem, life seems to be very smooth
and we display a positive attitude. But when a problem occurs then all hell
breaks loose.
We find it very
difficult to remain calm and composed because we are not prepared to face the
problem. We are not prepared because we keep praying every day that problems
should never occur in our lives. But in reality: “Problems are part of life.”
When a problem occurs, we are getting the opportunity to discover our strengths
and potential, which we would have never realized if we hadn’t faced it.
During the game, the kids kept analyzing whenever the situation got tougher and found a solution
to it. Similarly, when a problem occurs in life, we need to analyze what went
wrong. If we find out what went wrong, then we can easily find a solution and
make sure we avoid the same mistake next time.
An Open Mind
This simple game
changed my perspective. It gave me the courage to come out of my comfort zone.
I was now ready to take risks, and also to face its consequences boldly. Next,
I had to do something about my narrow-minded thinking. I knew that to lead a
happy life, we have to be associated with a career field that we like. I wanted
to be associated with the sports field but didn’t know how to do it. I thought: “Being
a player is the only option in this field, and it’s too late for me to become a
player now as I am 27 years old.”
I decided to open
up my mind and look at the field in a broad sense. I was able to see multiple
options: “I could start a business on sports goods, conduct sports events in
my area, provide coaching to little kids, start a sports-based Non-Profit
Organization etc. Damn, what was I thinking all along? No Options!! There are
so many options, and now I face the challenge of choosing one.” I realized
that it is important that we all love the work and not bother much about the
field. We may feel that there is just one option in a specific field, but if we
really love the work then we will see wide opportunities in the field.
Don’t Blindly Jump Into Anything
I, along with my
friend decided to open a small indoor game centre in a nearby area. We also
started a sports-based NGO (Non-Profit Organization) as we strongly felt that
sports can be used as an effective tool to improve the lives of the
underprivileged. However, we did not jump into this blindly. We had to make
sure that we had done all the right research and preparation to start our new
venture. We studied the area where we wanted to open the game centre, we
discussed with the right people, we purchased the required materials at a
nominal rate without compromising on the quality, and we promoted our business
well.
More importantly,
I waited for some time before I quit my regular job. I had to make sure that I
was financially stable before I switched to my new venture. And above all, I
had a backup, which is very important before starting a new venture. I decided
to utilize my writing skills and became a freelance writer. I did my writing
job parallelly whenever I got time. So, even if the sports venture fails, I
will have my writing job to support me until I rebuild the failed venture.
The Real Failure
That simple game of kicking and passing change my
life and made me a whole new person. It thought me to become resilient and look
at problems and risks from a different perspective. It made me realize what
real failure is. When the outcome of risk falls below expectation then that
should not be viewed as a failure. Not utilizing our talent should be
considered a real failure. When we miss out on opportunities because of the
fear of taking a risk then that should be viewed as a real failure.
The Fear Of Uncertainty
There is a saying,
“If you are not growing, then you are dying.” We show growth in our
lives only when we take risks. Taking a risk means exploring unknown
territories. And, sometimes you need to explore unknown territories to achieve
a goal. Taking a risk requires courage to face the fear of uncertainty.
Not taking Risk Can Be The Biggest Risk
While most of us
only think about the consequence of taking a risk, we don’t think about the
consequences of not taking a risk. One of the major reasons why youngsters
suffer from depression is because they stop chasing their dreams, and they keep
thinking about it all the time. They keep wondering if things would have been
different had they shown some courage.
“Did I make a
mistake? Should I have shown some courage? My life could have been different. I
would have been happy. Damn it!! Why didn’t I just choose the guitar over the
stethoscope?”
Fear Of Failure Shouldn’t Stop You
What is the worst thing that could happen if you
take a risk? You may fail. Nothing worse than this can happen. Always remember,
failure teaches you more than success. The experience will teach you a lot.
Risk gets you out of your comfort zone and teaches you more about yourself. The
most important thing is that you get to know the outcome. If you don’t take risks,
then you will never know the outcome and you will keep thinking about it your
whole life with guilt.
Through our Non-Profit Organization, we have been
supporting underprivileged kids in their sporting activities. We have been
training them in their favourite sport, providing kit and other required sports
materials to them, and have been helping them to attend selections. Apart from
these, we have been conducting life-skill sessions to make them understand that
problems are not something that is to be feared. Problems are part of our lives
and we need to face them boldly and find solutions. Sport is the best way to
impart these teachings as playing is fun and everything that is learnt through
games will remain with us for the rest of our lives.
It's Time To Throw Away The Smiling Mask
It was raining heavily, and I was sitting on a
chair in my bedroom, reading a message from one of my relatives. He was telling
me how I had made the mistake of quitting my high paying job and was advising
me that it’s still not late and that I can get back to it. I have received many
such messages and advice from many people over the last three years since the
time I quit my software job.
The last three years hasn’t been a smooth journey
for us as there have been a lot of setbacks. The two lockdowns hit us hard and
affected us in many ways. But, as I mentioned earlier, the game not just
changed my life, but it also made me resilient and I have been able to deal
with my problems with a smile on my face. I also had a smile on my face when I
was in my software job, but that was a smiling mask that I had to put on to
hide my pain as I headed to work each day.
I received a message again. This time it was from a
different person. It was one of our organization’s students. He had got
selected for training in a reputed football academy. He had also mentioned how
his life had no aim till about three years ago and how our organization gave
him a direction and helped him understand what he wants to achieve in his life.
He also thanked our organization for helping adolescents control their
emotions, especially anger. He mentioned how we played an integral role in
improving their sense of responsibility, the ability to express themselves,
their self-confidence and to avoid bad habits.
I forwarded this
message to my relative who had been constantly messaging me and telling me
about the biggest mistake that I had made of quitting my software job three
years ago. After forwarding this message, I typed another message and sent it
to him. It has been more than a week, and I have not yet received a reply from
him. I often keep looking at the message that I had sent to him. The message
read: “Always remember that promotion or increment should never be
considered as parameters that determine your career progress. It should be
based on your happiness and based on the change that you have managed to bring
about in your life and others around.”
Every time I read the messages that I receive from our organization’s students informing me about their achievements, it puts a smile on my face. Not the smiling mask, but a natural one that comes from the bottom of my heart.
AUTHOR NAME - Vinod Balan
AUTHOR EMAIL ID - vinod.balan883@gmail.com
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